I Don't Buy It. And Neither Should You.

Sigh.

Would this were true.

The Last Days of Telemarketing

As much as I hate spammers, tele-marketers truly depress me. Here's a real person and they're on a mission not just to annoy the hell out of me, the expect me to buy something. I'm rarely outright rude (OK, not so rare anymore), but gosh, what a way to make a living. What has lead you to the point in life where the best job you can get is sitting in a cubical farm and calling strangers, shilling. How sad for you.

Here's my rules for telemarketing, spam, and even door-to-door sales:

1. NEVER BUY FROM THEM. PERIOD.
That's right, and turn them away quickly. Yes, it's a person, but you're not obliged to talk to them. Yes, there is a difference for the neighborhood kid that's selling stuff to support their school - but not a big difference. If one of them approaches you, I suggest giving, but instead of buying junk, offer to make a direct contribution to their cause.

2. If you buy from these jerks, you make trouble for everyone else.
Why do they do it? Because it works. Spam a million people and ten will buy. So I'll spam 100 million. Again and again. Stop buying and stop everyone you know from buying. It's the only way it will stop.

3. If that wasn't clear enough for you, let me make it perfectly clear: Only stupid people buy from tele-marketers and spammers.
You're a mark. You've been conned. So wise up.

Let me tell you something else. Those television "info-mercials" aren't much better. It's a medicine show. It's all staged. The elixir they sell you is bathtub gin and gunpowder (which, unfortunately, I'm acquiring a taste for).

I have to admit, the Ginsu knifes I got at the Illinois State Fair 25 years ago are still razor sharp!