Free Porn Magic for You!

For the most part, I find John Dvorak a blowhard - a columnist that thinks that poking a chained dog with a stick is fun.

But he may be onto something here.

Opinion Column from PC Magazine: Free Porn Magic for You!

I suspect he's right on all counts, and I'll be watching the logs on this web site for evidence.

But I'll do you one better. His article has no sex in it at all. I'll give you the secrets of sex and happiness, all for the low price of only $19.95!

That's right, send Captain Randy your personal check (sorry, PayPal not accepted) for $19.95 and I will revel to you the secrets of:

Finding the perfect mate.
Getting all the sex you want.
What women really want and how to give it to them or what men want and how to make them your slave for life
Your purpose in life and amazing the truth about the universe.

And as an added bonus, how to get real Rolex watches for a fraction of the cost!

For an additional $4.95 I'll also tell you how to be the Apple iPod for free!

But it's a limited time offer - act now!



* Secrets of the universe, although startling, are also available through a lifetime of study and meditation. Or for only $19.95 they can be yours! Sorry, no refunds or exchanges. Karma can neither be bought or sold, only apportioned by the universe.